Utter Disappointment - Nandos

My first trip to Nandos I purposely got off work an hour early, reached there at 530pm only to be greeted by a sign that says, "We're closed at 6pm today!" -_-" 2nd trip there kena super long queue that wasn't moving.

My 3rd trip was yesterday. Dee got there early and got seated immediatly so I quickly parked my car and went up. There weren't any servers when I was at the door so I just stepped in to look for Dee. Suddenly, this really tall ah char raced behind me and called out, "HEY EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME MISS! CAN I HELP YOU?" As if i was trying to cut the queue, steal something or plant a bomb lah! My goodness, I was merely standing there looking around for Dee, which i think is quite obvious ley.. Don't need to raise his voice and make everybody turn their head and give me the dirty look right? Nabey..

Anyway, I finally sat down and we've decided to share the 1/2 Chicken that comes with 2 sides. We chose Peri Chips and Peri Corn for the sides and we requested the waiter to give us an extra plate cause we're sharing. While waiting, I started telling Dee that this Nandos is very different from those in Melbourne and London. Usually the decor is red and green that's more Mexicano, hispanic. But this one has alot of brown and gold, a bit Indo. And there isn't any counter to place your own orders or menu boards to look at. The table tag is a black metal rooster instead of the colourful wooden rooster number tag. The uniform were a bit dull compared to those in Melbourne that had one-liners like, "We don't serve drunk chicks."

When our food came, this was how it looked:
I totally snapped... Do you see anything wrong with this picture?? No??
How bout this?

Not clear enough? Try this with added diagrams:

I really find that Peri Corn very miserable and ridiculous. So outrageous that I went on and on at it and kaobey to Dee last night before I slept and this morning again before I went to work. We had assumed that pricing at $22 would be relatively sumptious for 2 people but it was barely enough. NEVERMIND, I can close an eye on that. But wtf is that piece of corn sooooooo fucking small?? I'm not asking for like 5 and a half rows of corn here, but an equivalent portion to the fries would be reasonable yah!? On the sides menu, it says $3.50 if i remember correctly. I rather eat the $2 bland cup corn at GV..


Even hawker centre chicken chop ah ceks also know what is appropriate portioning.

As if this wasn't appalling enough. After we finished our food, this waiter/OM came to clear our plates. While holding the plate, he stood there and said with a questioning nod (sticking out the chin kinda nod), "How's the food?" Me and Dee were a bit stunned by the abrupt and crude interruption. And there he repeated himself with the questioning nod again. I dunno how you define customer service but without an appropriate opening line like a courteous greeting, shooting a question blankly with the stupid nod is definitely impolite/rude in any social situation. Even if you didn't mean to, you've definitely made yourself appear to be integorative and disrespectful. I won't mind if i know him personally, but him being an operation manager of an international franchise, I really cannot tah han. I'll rate him Double Fail and this Bugis branch can kiss my ass.

SCB Sucks too!

This is sort of like a part 2 from my previous post DBS Is Shit (setting up a corporate bank account). After retrieving my $40,000 cheque from the big-ass fat manager Madelene, I made a call to Standard Chartered Bank's RM. She sent me the form and guided me thru filling the details. In authorised signatories page, there's a box for you to write down any specific instructions. For the years of studying, I have always thought that a big empty box on a worksheet or a form meant "write what you want clearly in your own words". So i wrote, "Group A authorise any amount. Group B requires both signature to authorise any amount."
The RM called and told me to re-word it and im like,

"HUH? Is it not clear enough?"
"Err.. The sentences might be read in other ways and cause misunderstanding."
"Group A only need 1 signature, Group B need 2 signatures. U all work in banks should know what i meant right?"
"Yah. I understand very clearly but cause it's written down so it's better to phrase it more straight forward."
"Hmm.. I don't know how to paraphrase it to make it any clearer. Why don't you tell me what to write."
"Errr... Just say something like, "For any amount, Group A dash 1 to sign and Group B dash 2 to sign.""
"OK."
Reflecting on this incident as I'm writing made me realise that im indeed a fool and terribly ignorant to even have the intention of defaming them when im the idiot. If they had wanted me to write sentences, they would have drawn lines in the box! How could i not notice!? Did you not know that too?? We have been groomed and so accustomed to writting essays, emails and formal business letters that when we're given an empty box, we under-utilize our ability to express ourselves. From now on, I will make full use of such empty spaces to express myself to the fullest. On a seperate occassion, this SCB lady teller who looks around early thirties was serving me. She passed me the bundle of cash and i asked for an envelope to put them in. The stack was quite thick and she saw me having problem closing the lid and she said to me, "Do you need Skors-stage?"
"Huh?"
"Do you need Skors-stage?"
"OH! No need! Thanks!" and i walked out am-chioing in my head, cursing why nobody's with me to hear this!

How to Remove iPhone Cover

I bought Dee an Uncommon Capsule Case for her iPhone. It's the sliding kind which is suppose to be the best type. It's really thick and the design is similar to this Owl . After using it for 2months, Dee wanted to take out the cover to clean some accumulated dust but she couldn't. It didn't even budge unless u count 0.1cm as something significant. So she just ditched the idea and waited, hoping one day the case will decide to come out on its own (like we all do).

Another 2 months past, I bought her a UNU battery case that has a fitted flash light. This time she attempts to take the cover out again to fit her new gadget on but yeah, its just so super tightly snugged like it was cemented. I tried googling for help and the results were:

1. Place your iPhone in the freezer for 5mins so that your phone will contract.

2. Break the whole case into small pieces since ur probably damn pissed off anyway!

3. Put some kinda oil to lubricate the sides and it will slide off easily. The person mentioned a specific brand of oil but i've forgotten and think it's too risky already. Seep in how?? Dee will kill me!

Anyway, i started to look for objects that can fit thru the ear piece hole on top of the case.

I finally found this permanent marker that has a tough eraser at the end that can fit through! With a few thuds, i was able to slide the case out about 3cm! So i immediately when to show Dee with a WIDE grin that i achieved something.. hehehe... But my grin was short-lived.

Even though i was able to fit my fingers thru, i couldnt take it out at all. And it hurt my fingers so much yah.. Can't even wiggle it through! >_<"

My last resort which really worked rather quickly and without much effort..

I took a few different type of round chopsticks to try and yeah, they fit quite well! Hold the chopstick in place with ur thumb firmly. Hold the top part firm enough to balance the phone and loose enough for it to slide up upon impact. Once ready, thrust the phone + Chopstick downwards with reasonable force. Newton says Force = Mass X Acceleration, but over here, i'l like to think that:

FORCE = FRUSTRATION + PAIN EXPERIENCED

Start slow and increase the force along with sense of desperation. Dee's phone came out entirely with around 3-4 thrusts.

If you find this tip useful, or even just slightly entertaining, please click on the advertisement and help your pal out.. :)

Disclaimer: This is how i managed to get my phone out safe and sound. Under no circumstances shall this post or i be responsible for any breakage of chopsticks or iphones.

Study Methods for CEHA Paper 2 & 3

I just got back my CEHA results a while ago and to my horror, I failed Paper 1 which I had studied the most. I was so super confident that I will score since I've done some business law units when i was in Uni. Surprisingly, I passed Paper 2 and Paper 3 which i thought i would have definitely failed. Thinking back, I presume it must have been the different studying methods that I've used.

Study Method for Paper 1: FAIL

I attended almost all of the lessons very attentively. Tirelessly wrote alot of notes on each topic. Printed notes to revise and memorise the god damn URA Act and the sickening Development Charge etc.

Do drop me a mail if you want my fabulous notes. I more than happy to share with you my knowledge like how I'm sharing the correct method to study for CEHA to the world.

Study Method for Paper 2 and Paper 3: PASSED

Step 1 - Procrastinate and slowly taper off your attendance to the Paper 2 and Paper 3 classes. Get ur classmates to mark the attendance for you - very important!

Step 2 - Book tickets and go to London for 10 days. Walk around the city and take lots of pictures.

Step 3 - Eat lots of fish and chips.

Step 4 - Go on a road trip to Stonehenge.

Step 5, 6, 7 and 8 - Go to Gala and play a few rounds of blackjack. Drink lots of beer. Go to Saatchi Gallery and get inspired. Fly back to Singapore and skim through the CEHA notes the night before the exam.

Exam Tips:

During Paper 1, I drafted and planned what I had wanted to write. Processed my thoughts in argueing each case with reference to the relevant laws that I had remembered by heart. Wrote with much clarity and finished what I had wanted to express ahead of time. I can't emphasize enough, I failed this paper so please do not adopt this method of studying and exam habits!!

What you really need to know about how to prepare for Paper 2 & Paper 3 is to panic and regret not being disciplined enough to study during the London trip. Give up on simple calculation questions even though you have memorised the Development Charge formular, yet feeling confused and not quite confident to apply. Pick open-ended questions where you do not require to give a definite or quantified answer. And then bullshit and smoke through with all the mini bits and fragments of memory you had of yourself sitting back in the CEHA class playing with ur phone. This is how I got through Paper 2 and 3!!

Anybody with tips to tackle Paper 1 please contact me asap! I'm retaking it in July..!! Need help!

DBS is Shit

Why? WHY?! Why must i always face this kinda situation where big corporates think they can way their way with me and sodomise me? It's already shit to fill up 4-5 pages of application form. Suay suay 1 mistake and i need to go get another set of fresh forms to fill. And how unfortunate can i get? This CB Giao Torh customer service gave me 1 page short in the set of application forms! Imbecile! Here's the rest of the story which i wrote on the Customer Feedback Form just 5mins ago. Fuck you DBS for your ever long queues and overpaid shit manager!

Hi there, our company intended to open another coporate account for our newly set up company called G****** International Pte Ltd. I went to the Habourfront branch last Tuesday/Wednesday and submitted the application forms together with a $40,000 cheque to this nice Malay lady whom i think her name was ***. She called me last Friday to tell me that my application was rejected and she is unable to give me the reason as to why. She had duly adviced me to go back to the branch to collect the cheque. Instead, i requested that she get somebody who can help me to call me back. She promptly got the manager to call me and i explained to her that we have got 3 corporate accounts with DBS and would like our new company to be with DBS so that it'll be more convenient for us. She said she'll review the application and get back to me on monday, 7th June.

Today is already the 8th of June. I have received no replies from her. I called the 1800-111-1111 earlier and your customer service said they'll get her to contact me asap. Its already 6pm now and i still have received no news.

If your bank is unwilling to support our new business then please return me my $40,000 cheque. Don't hold it for 1 god damn week and not give me any news. I truly hope you guys have not misplaced or lost my cheque or conveniently forgotten to follow up on my case.

Fujifilm Mounted!

I received a call from Fujifilm 1 week after I sent them the Service Feedback email. Those who missed out, please read the email in my previous post. (It's a joy to read and will also give you a great sense of justice, that our voice as a consumer is being heard!)

Anyway! The manager called and told me that they have taken apart the camera, took them alot of effort to blow out all the sand particles from the littlest crevices and fixed it. They will not charge me any money for it, except for the $10.70 that i have already paid. And on top of that, they have contacted their Japan office to try and find out how much it would cost for an exact new set to be shipped in for me.

I was catch unprepared, so i said, "Oh, ok. That's great. So when can I go collect the camera? Tomorrow?" in a really calm and straight voice even though i was in fact jumping up and down, feeling victorious! It was like that one time in JC when i scored 12/20 for the econs essay where the rest of my class had failed theirs. Super duper happy but i have to keep it inside to remain diplomatic.. The moment i put down the phone, i was sending VICTORY emails to everybody.

I was back to the service centre once again to collect the repaired camera, nothing changed. The reception was slow and the same malay girl serving me took like 15mins to find my camera in all the drawers to then realise that it's with the manager. The manager came out to meet me personally and apologised to me about the technician. We did a test shot and the quality remained great but can see the side of the lens were badly scratched when its extended.

Jessica was very upset about it for quite a while. I was upset that i broke her camera and got it badly scratched too. At the same time, I'm head over heels about winning this battle! Wheeee!

Kenny, if you're reading this, you must feel proud that the camera went to battle and came back with victory k!

Pinkdot 2010 - Triumphant Declaration

It was my virgin Pinkdot. Glad to see many supporting families and frens, spreading the message of love and acceptance. The Pinkdot video are very touching. If you have not seen it, please go! It's an opportunity for you to kick your daily thoughts of chores and start thinking about the bigger picture for a moment before you resume to the humanity regressive 9-5pm cycle.

Dee didn't go last year and her frens who were able to spot themselves on the aerial pic must have made alot of triumphant declarations (TDs) on facebook. This year, she brought me there with great determination to accomplish the mission of being in the aerial pic.

However, when we got there, i realise that Dee was wrong. It wasn't about being in the aerial pic and posting TDs. She must have been blinded by envy and took the TD decoys. Being surrounded by >4000 people in pink, my competive alterego started to realise that it was all about being the Pinkiest!! It is a pink war~!

In my head, i started a Pink point system with the tone of pink that peopel are wearing, number of pink accessories, presence of non-pink member in the group and animals in pink were bonus points. Below is a brief description of my warfare vision on that day.

The average attendees:

Pink War Winner:

Anyway, unprepared to fight the pink war with Dee, I returned my focus to fight the fake war and won the "ability to spot myself faster than Dee with my ultra topology and geomatric skills" award.

Unfortunately, Marilyn, Melvin and Yi were cut off from the pic.

TD for Pinkdot 2010: Better luck next year!